Just another post of mine
Well hi um, its 1.38 AM. I've no idea what woke me up super early in the "morning". sigh. As soon as I wake up, the flashbacks are gushing through my head. It feels like video game ah. k what. lol. Just great. why do I have to be so sentimental early in the morning? I have to admit tho that I freakin miss the old times, the old routines and what I used to do......... It was too wonderful that its too hard for me to leggo and somewhat, I am emotionally attached to it (well I've always been. didnt I?). I'm having a hard time trying to adapt to the new situation (no, def. not environment). Well eversince it started to change actually. boo. Despite of all the flashbacks, yeah, pessimism decided to attack me as well. crap future is freaking me out :( I wish it was my call. yaknow. I'm sick of all these. banar tah. I do know tho that sometimes wrong choices bring us to the right place. No, I'm not blaming anything for everything that has happened. I'm just letting it out. but still, with all these negativity? gosh, I've no freaking idea. Yaknow what I hate the most? being surrounded with freakin A students. T_T well who doesnt? Peer pressure bah trus. what even. idk bro. The fact that some of my friends or people thought I'm smart and an A student, seriously bro? I am not :( I dont know when will I. I used to be one. not to rub it off in yo faces. thats all I can say, I used to be one“It’s much easier to not know things sometimes. Things change and friends leave. And life doesn’t stop for anybody. I wanted to laugh. Or maybe get mad. Or maybe shrug at how strange everybody was, especially me. I think the idea is that every person has to live for his or her own life and then make the choice to share it with other people. You can’t just sit their and put everybody’s lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love. You just can’t. You have to do things. I’m going to do what I want to do. I’m going to be who I really am. And I’m going to figure out what that is. And we could all sit around and wonder and feel bad about each other and blame a lot of people for what they did or didn’t do or what they didn’t know. I don’t know. I guess there could always be someone to blame. It’s just different. Maybe it’s good to put things in perspective, but sometimes, I think that the only perspective is to really be there. Because it’s okay to feel things. I was really there. And that was enough to make me feel infinite. I feel infinite”
― Stephen Chbosky
umkay I should go back to sleep.
Have a great day,
Au Revoir!
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