21
Hey.....
It's been a while. first thing first..... I turned 21 few weeks ago and which also happened to be the same week I lost my grandma, forever. It was pretty heartbreaking to be honest. I couldn't make it back home on time. I kinda jinxed myself too few days before when my bey asked when am I going back to Brunei in which, I answered 4th April and I sort of saw it coming tho as I tweeted weird stuff the night before she passed away. kids, shut yo mouth.
I'm still in the denial phase tho. Everything aint gonna be the same anymore. I mean, there'll be no one to make fun of my zits anymore (I had a terrible breakout) and powdered it using baby powder (HAHA. i miss u so much ni and it hurts :( ), no one to look forward to anymore from my mother's side, no more listening to her stories about whoever that stranger was to us or about her past, no more asking for her blessings before I leave for KL and.... it still hurts, to be honest. This year will going to be my first year celebrating Eid without both of my maternal grandparents. I'm still not sure if I wanna go back tho for Eid.
I'm still in the denial phase tho. Everything aint gonna be the same anymore. I mean, there'll be no one to make fun of my zits anymore (I had a terrible breakout) and powdered it using baby powder (HAHA. i miss u so much ni and it hurts :( ), no one to look forward to anymore from my mother's side, no more listening to her stories about whoever that stranger was to us or about her past, no more asking for her blessings before I leave for KL and.... it still hurts, to be honest. This year will going to be my first year celebrating Eid without both of my maternal grandparents. I'm still not sure if I wanna go back tho for Eid.
I did went back home tho for few days. Ya know what they said, everything happens for a reason. I'm still in the process of digesting this. I received the news when I was in class, physiology class to be exact. I had to endure so much obstacles (and pain) before I could finally go back (and after too btw). I do still miss her every now and then. I never thought last January was going to be my last kiss and hug to you. I'm glad I went back tho before starting my new semester.
and my birthday part.... Initially I wanted to spend it with my BFF since I never celebrated it with her and it fell perfectly on a weekend. but ehh I wont fret. I'll come up with something (eh hi bey *HINTHINT*).
P.S I'm currently on exam period and I will be sitting for my Physio final exam later. why am I even here :|
I forever love u gramma, Al-Fatihah,
Au Revoir!
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